Cruising

As I prepare for a nice, relaxing family vacation, I am reminded of how my own father (the daredevil who dives with sharks and handles snakes in continents that require a twin-engine plane, a two day bus trip and then a donkey ride to get to the paddle boat that will carry him to his ideal vacation spot) likes to spend HIS holidays.

His good-sport girlfriend of the last 25 years asked if they could, just this once, go on a vacation not requiring vaccinations or malaria medicine.  She wanted to go on a cruise.  A nice, relaxing, spa- filled cruise. 

He conceded, but only after making known his disgust with all cruise-lovers and their propensity for never-ending buffet visits and beached-whale laziness. 

This being said, he decided to make his torturous cruising experience more enjoyable by entertaining himself with preparations for the practical jokes he planned to implement onboard. 

As a printer with his own company, he has license to create and manifest the most elaborate, high-end materials to suit his whim (just wait for the Christmas cards in December!) just for the sake of a good laugh.

He printed up some of the most beautiful wedding-worthy invitations with the bidding – “You Are Cordially Invited to Join Us For Dinner With The Captain” printed on them and slid them underneath random cruiser’s doors.  That night, he sat back and watched as one by one, passengers arrived, invitations in hand, at the captain’s table to join him for the evening.

As if that were not entertainment enough, he also printed the most realistic full-color coupons that read “Present this coupon in our gift shop for your free (Name of Cruiseline) shirt or hat” and passed those out as he had done the dinner invites.

I think he considered the trip an enjoyable success. 

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